Sunday, November 6, 2011





We all live under the same sky, but we don't all have the same horizon.

I spent a lot of time working my way to my 40th birthday, writing my thirtysomething, farewell blog, and processing the journey as I went. Several of my best friends journied to 40 this year along with me, and the last one finally turns 40 this week. To commemorate, we got together, this weekend, for an overnight, complete with chocolate cake martinis. We also went out, in Armory Square in Syracuse, to Pastabilities...obviously a play on Possibilities. It is exciting to think of the possibilites that are open to us as we venture into this second half of our lives. They are endless for sure. Still, it is funny that, when looked at a different way, the restaurant's name also pays homage to something else...

Past abilities.

In the past, the way past, it was so easy to make friends. All it took was going to the same school, being in the same class. You shared an existance, based on fate, and parental local. But in the end, if you have friends that you have held on to since childhood, those bonds, and that shared history, is very unique, and a gift to be treasured.

Next came college,where bonding was quick,and sometimes facilitated by a purple coat and a snowstorm. Simply walking into someones dorm room to say "Hi," or spending a snowy afternoon sharing life stories, created friends for life. Subsequent late nights goofing off, studying, or drinking to the point of silliness, helped to create the stories you laugh about over and over again. These people know too much. You have to keep them close!

Early marriage, and playing house and grownup for the first times, makes for special friend bonds. Then as you, perhaps, join the sorority of motherhood, again, you bond quickly if you find someone at the same stage as you. It might be doing something as seemingly incidental as eating no bake cookies, on a staff room couch, very pregnant, and discussing how to bring on labor. When you find someone to bond with over your kids, that is another bond that is unbreakable. After all, you were with this person as you became a different person...as you became a mom.

Yep, past ability. It sure was easy to make those friendships. It is harder, now, to maintain friendships. Life in general gets busier and busier year after year. Some lives take different paths altogether. We live under the same sky but have different horizons. Still, when we sit back and look at the joy our friends bring us, it is worth every single bit of effort it takes to have these people with us, on this journey called life. These people who know us, inside and out, and love us anyways. Even when we are needy, or fall out of touch, even when we get too silly, or drink too much, even when we love our iPad a little more than we should...heehee...we are friends for life...and the journey through life continues.

Forward...to 50...and beyond!

(Btw, just to be honest, stole the "same sky/different horizon" thought off the packaging for earrings I bought in downtown Saturday night...giving credit where credit is due. Still, I now feel completely justified in my purchase for the clarity it has brought me...the closure...wow! I need to shop and then write more often I guess!)